Happy New Year…in March

The start of a new year is a great time to reminisce on the past year and look forward to a new chapter. When the clock turned from 2023 to 2024, I was very sick and very pregnant, just trying to sleep through the night and counting down the days to my scheduled C-section. I wasn’t too interested in looking back and I was too anxious to look too far into the future. Although I do acknowledge it is March, I am declaring that this is indeed my “new year.”

As I celebrate with some take out BBQ and Eric’s homemade cookies, I thought I would share some highlights of 2023 (and three months of 2024). 

The beginning of 2023 started with a variety of art projects - one of the most exciting was this finished mural. After waiting out a lot of cold weather, I was finally able to finish painting in February. It was so fun (but also bittersweet) when it was completed. 

One of the biggest events of the year was our move to Tennessee in March. Eric and I bought a house without having physically stepped inside (shoutout to our amazing realtor, Shannon) and on the very same day we closed, a tree fell and crushed our HVAC.

How ominous… but actually it turns out moving to Tennessee is really fun, even with trees falling down on your house. We have loved living here. The friends we have made feel like family and the area we live has been perfect for us. We love being able to make improvements on the house. Although it's more like Eric makes the improvements and I cheer him on. As I type this out, Eric is in the kitchen installing a new window. Also, we have a fancy new HVAC now which is pretty cool. 

In April, Eric and I did something my teenage self would never have thought possible. We bought a dog. When we were dating, I emphatically stated that I would never have any animals in my home. I conceded to having an “outdoor dog” at some point in our lives if we had a big yard and some sort of garage, but that was me being lenient. Fast forward to to us driving to Chattanooga to pick up a puppy.

Mabel just turned 1 this March and she has been the best. She is a sassy and snuggly dog and I even let her sit with me on the couch…and occasionally on the bed. It really is a shock to us all. 

Then a couple weeks later after getting Mabel I found out I was pregnant with our second baby. Cue the 9 months of sleeping, nausea, and anxiety. Don’t get me wrong - I was so excited and happy. AND it was also pretty rough. I am pretty open about losing our son, Tucker, who was stillborn. His loss was the most painful thing to have ever happened in our lives. The mere possibility of something similar happening again seemed unbearable. It felt like the rest of the year was spent on pause. There were still things that happened, but I mostly was just counting down to baby girl’s due date. 

New Years came and went and then on January 10th, Hallie was born. The last few weeks before she was born were so anxiety-filled that the weeks following her birth felt like a breezy walk on cloud nine. We had so much help from family and friends and Hallie has been the sweetest baby. Something that surprised me was how my grief regarding Tucker’s loss found new areas in my heart. Having Hallie in my arms, seeing her cry and sleep and smile gave me a deeper perspective of all that we couldn’t have with Tucker. I have felt his absence in new ways. He would have been a toddler running around while I tried to wrangle him and this new baby. 

He is always remembered, loved, and missed. It has been an interesting journey - one filled with so much joy and pain. When I am sitting on the couch next to Eric with Hallie in my arms and Mabel laying by our feet, I think of Tucker near us and hope we can all be together someday. 

These spring days have now been filled with gummy smiles, walks along the greenway, getting together with friends, and new art projects. This year I have a half marathon planned, hopefully some mural work, and more baby milestones. 

I want to say thank you for your support and for following along. I hope you have a great new year (can you still say that in March?!) and here’s to 2024!